Bigfoot?

I am not one for believing in conspiracies or mythical creatures, but as time goes on, there happens to be one such thought that is becoming more pervasive. That thought is Bigfoot. But wait, hear me out before you click the "Next Blog" button. I may be able to convince you too.

A long long time ago, within the evolution of the primate order, existed a hominoid known as Gigantipithecus. I know, I know, it sounds like I just made this up, but it really existed and took residence in East Asia. This seems a lot like the Abominable Snowman. Look at the picture and you tell me.

There are even two species of Gigantipithecus that look an awful lot like the Sasquatch and the Yeti.

Death Only Comes Once

There comes a point in a man's (or woman's) life when you must think about the ideal way to die. For many this means going out quietly and painlessly, for others it means quick and to the point, but for me, I want to go out in the coolest way possible. A couple of my friends and I have researched some of the best possible ways to exit this life, but my favorite thus far still has to be 8th century punishment for being a prophet. For those of you who didn't know, this entitles being sawed in half, with a wooden saw, while you're still awake. Sure, this might be painful and a tad bit brutal, but what's important here is to think about the bragging rights you will receive in heaven.

Post Script: Please feel free to give suggestions on ways to kick the bucket.

C'est Mon Ami: Ross Kenagy

This is my friend, Ross. Growing up he wanted to be a paleontologist (perhaps because his mother may/may not have been one), but through out much of his high school years he aspired to be a cinematographer. I haven't a clue about why this dream faded, but it may have something to do with his lack of interest in filming things. Currently Ross can be found at Missouri State University following his artistic heart and perhaps singing to Death Cab for Cutie.

Could You Build Me a Pyramid?

Did the aliens build the pyramids? I know that is the question on everyone's mind nowadays, and to be quite frank with you, the answer is yes. Clearly precise angles and flawless margins between each brick point to a more advanced civilization other than our own. After much research, the only feasible conclusion is that some type of humanoid specimen with the ability to use flashlights 4,000 years ago had to construct these marvelous pieces of architecture. Oh yes, I am talking about the Scientologists.

No, but in all seriousness, there are people out there who fully believe that extraterrestrials came to this earth and for the exchange of our goods, built the pyramids. I find this theory flawed for a couple reasons, one being, why the heck would they provide us with ornamentation? Couldn't they have given us something useful like UFOs or a time machine? Secondly, humans have built the city of Dubai into a mega city in just 19 years. Sure, technology is more advanced, but given Egypt's uncanny ability to utilize mass number of slaves, doesn't it sound reasonable that they were the ones who poured their sweat and blood into this massive project? If I were one of them watching from heaven, I would be pissed and appalled that darn aliens are plagiarizing my work.

Maybe I am just biased considering I am an Anthropology student and my first goal is to give mankind the benefit of the doubt. Theoretically, I could be wrong, and well, if I am then I guess I have some explaining to do to ET one day.

A Night Through the Complacent Eye

Sometimes there are moments in life when you just waste a whole bunch of your time and when it is all said and done, you haven't really accomplished anything. I had one of these evenings tonight all because I made my own blog, and ever since 10:30 I have been trying to figure out what just to write while concurrently watching "South Park." Three hours later I have come up with this little number here. I know, I know, it's rather sad but I really wanted to get something down on my new naked blog, so I bring you my evening. For everyone everywhere, sleep tight and enjoy the day.